The Army Truck

The Army Truck

Friday, November 11, 2011

If you can see past the anger and hate . . .

...you're definitely in the minority among Aggie fans. I personally have trouble understanding it. Maybe it's like mashed potatoes. They're fine. They're not great. They're just fine. But if it's all you had to eat every freakin' year maybe you'd start to get mad. Maybe you'd get so mad that the idea of more mashed potatoes would make you want to punch someone? And then post about it on the internet. A lot. And so, it seems, the prospect of another 8 win year has got a lot of fans upset. We lost another game and people are wound up about it.

Sure it was a top ten team, but we still lost another game. It's time to get out the torches and pitchforks. It's time to warm up the tar and pluck the feathers off a chicken or two. There's nothing left to be done but a good old fashioned witch hunt. Because, it's a certifiable, bonafide fact that we lost to OU on Saturday up in Norman, Oklahoma. I was there and there's just no way around that. There is no alternative.

Or is there?

You see, I googled "Time Travel" and lo and behold, I was able to buy two time trips from a site in the Netherlands (not the same as the "Nether Regions", Paul, you need a passport to get there). And, I used my first trip back in time to garner fabulous wealth for myself so I could live a movie star's life and shower the program with money. But I found the super models and big yachts shallow and unfulfilling, so I used my second trip to undo the first one and now I'm out of time travel vouchers. On the plus side, I feel better about myself and now I know who wins American Idol this year. Oh well, I tried to bend the laws of time and space and apparently that's still not enough for us to win all our games.

I guess everyone will just have to remember 2011 as the year we didn't go undefeated and didn't win the national championship in football.

I just don't think it's as bad as everyone makes it out to be. Our defense did pretty well. Sure, OU hung 28 on us in the 3rd quarter last weekend, but OU started three of those possessions inside the A&M 40. When OU started in their own territory they only scored on 3 of 12 possessions. But, when they started in A&M territory they scored on 4 of 7 possessions. You can try to blame the defense, but the defense didn't ask to start SEVEN possessions with their backs against the wall. For comparison, A&M started every single possession on their own side of the field.
Offensively I thought we were pretty even with OU. We scored on 4 of 18 possessions (all started in our own territory) and had two uncharacteristically missed field goals in the mix. We had 527 yards of offense (5.7 / play) vs. 404 yards (4.7 / play). They didn't sack us at all. Except for the turnovers, this was really a pretty decent game.
Man I hate turnovers. The four turnovers definitely cost us this game. Again. They have cost us every single lost game this year. That's not to say we would have won absent the turnovers. Who can know for sure? It's just that this game didn't appear competitive from the box score when in reality it was. You'll just have to take my word for it.

It's now officially time to focus your attention on the Kansas State game. think, think, Think, THINK! FOCUS!! Concentrate!!!!

Are you focusing? What did you come up with?

What a silly mascot.

I'm just saying. K-State isn't that interesting to me.

The K-State story actually parallels A&M's pretty well for the last several years. You see, Kansas State has also had a rough run this decade. They replaced a legendary coach with something else. It didn't work. Sound familiar?

But then three years ago someone staked out the Luby's handicapped parking spots before the 4:30 dinner rush and caught Bill Snyder by the arm. They confused him with the Medicare Plan B pamphlets and talk of a donut hole and while he was telling a story about "the big one" they got him to sign a contract to return to coaching. Don't let the hover-round fool you. He's still plenty wily for a man from the greatest generation. He's got a solid 7-2 team and didn't lose to Missouri, so he's got a Sans-a-Belt leg up on the Yankee from College Station. We'll need to be ready.
And I think we will be ready. For one thing, I honestly believe we're a better team than they are. We held OU and OSU to 71 points. Not great, but it's better than the 110 point KSU held them to. And our defense has gotten better each week. If you go back and actually look at the games you'll see this to be true. I think we'll be able to score on those Wildkitties.

So buckle up the Barcalounger and tune in the old boobtube to ABC at 2:30 tomorrow. When we get done jarring those corn-fed teeth loose, it'll take more than a tube of Bill's Fixodent to get 'em all back in place. Tomorrow we set things straight.

Gig 'em and Beat the Hell Outta Kansas State!
-Chuck '96


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