OU don't know what to expect.

Did you get the double entendre there? I worked for literally seconds on that one. See, (1) "OU doesn't know what to expect from us." - OR - "Oh, you don't know what to expect.", implying that peoples' perceptions about this game may be off. Expect the unexpected. Oh the english language is magical.

I included some new folks on the email this week, Chris, Mike and John . They stopped by the tailgate on accident Satuday and got suckered into sticking around for a while. I thought I would throw them into the fire. Guys, I take up a little of everyone's time each week to ramble about the game and whatever else comes to mind. If you'd rather not receive it, just let me know and I'll drop your names. No worries.

I want to briefly touch on the Missouri game and then move on.

SH*%, G*%D*&M, SON OF B*&%H, ()*&$# *&#$@*#)&#^)&*^@)*&^$(*@#$^)*(@$)*(^&#%$&*(%(&*%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok. That's about all I have to say about that.

Let's examine our next opponent, OU.

OU is a very good team with an impeccable home field record. Historically we haven't faired well in Norman. You may recall that some years ago we let one slip away late and lost 77-0 up there. They're ranked in the top 10, again. They beat the whorns by 38 points earlier this year. The line on the game is OU by 16.5.

By any rational analysis, you would have to assume that we're not favored in this one. I will instead, then, rely on irrational analysis.

First, we'll look at what I call the "Toddler Effect". The Toddler Effect goes something like this: I have a 2 year old son, and I know that eventually he will stop cr*pping in his pants. Same for the Ags. The Toddler Effect.

Second, we'll examine what I call the "Roy Sullivan" effect or alternatively the "Lightning Really Does Strike Twice in the Same Place" theory. See, Roy Sullivan has been struck by lightning seven times. Everyone assumes that it just doesn't happen, but sometimes it does. OU really could lose consecutive home games. Roy Sullivan.

Next we'll look at the Platypus Theory. The Platypus Theory states that since God has a sense of humor (hence the existence of duck billed platypi) any number of other funny things could happen just to amuse him. Don't you think God would find humor in A&M beating OU two years in a row? I know I would.

Lastly, we'll look at the Blind Squirrel hypothesis. As everyone knows, even a blind squirrel finds an acorn once in a while. Well, I think we may find an acorn up in Norman. For us that would be putting together four complete quarters of football. The thing is, it has to happen more often than you would assume, or the blind squirrels would all be dead (starvation). It's not as unlikely as you think. Blind Squirrel.

In reality, we've got the talent on offense to win up in Norman. We really do. But, it's a little like me having the capacity to lose weight. I'm very comfortable that it's possible. I'm just not sure how likely it is. That said, I am on a diet right now and I'm down 3 pounds this week. So who knows?

OU is a good team with a good set of coaches. So are we. We've had a lot of injuries on defense and every week we've had to cobble together a different set of players just to field a team. It's not surprising that they've not come along as much as we had expected this year. That said, I do think the defense has gotten incrementally better each week. We'll have to see what happens tomorrow.

Our offense is as good or better than any offense in the country when they are firing on all cylinders. Every one of our offensive starters could start or be close to it on any team in the country. There is no one on offense that you have to make excuses for. I can't explain the offense disappearing in the second half of games. I have no excuse for it, but I don't think it's a talent issue. I think this one is on playcalling. That can be fixed.

I'm going up to Norman to watch this game. I'm going to do all that I can to help the team along. I'm tired of listening to all the whiny pot bangers. People act like we've been relegated to the Sunbelt Conference and perpetual mediocrity. "It's over and there's nothing we can do. We'll never win again."

Bull Butter!

Sure, this season has been a kick in the pants, but SO WHAT? When you get thrown from a horse, what do you do? You don't just get back on, you go whip the sh*t out of the horse, and then you get back on. It's time to rally around the team and the coach. These are my guys. They aren't mercenaries. They're Aggies. They go to the same class rooms I went to as a student. The eat in the same places. They're Aggies. They love A&M just as much as I do. They leave it all out on the field every week for A&M. They're my guys. And I just can't imagine abandoning them right now.

So, I'm driving up to Norman, Oklahoma tomorrow morning, and if my team and my coach can't do it, then I will personally BEAT THE EVER LOVIN HELL OUTTA OU all by myself!!!! And Tim too, of course. I'll let him clear out the easy ones up front and I'll come in after to take care of the rest. ;)

This game is on ABC at 2:30 PM. You'll want to watch just in case I get called in there at the end.

Gig 'em and Beat the Hell Outta OU!

Chuck '96