Holy Cr*p this is a Big Game!

This is it. It may well be the biggest game of the Big 12’s last meaningful season and it’s happening in College Station on Saturday afternoon at 2:30 PM. The Fightin’ Texas Aggies vs. the Oklahoma State "Fabulous" Cowboys. It will feature two top ten teams, several future first round NFL draft choices, big time offense, a tremendous crowd, lots of national exposure and more Brokeback Mountain jokes than you've probably heard in a couple of years.

Who in the world would want to miss that? Mickey Mouse. That’s who. Apparently Steamboat Willie feels that watching LSU curb-stomp (get it?) the Mountaineers is a better use of the ESPN College Game Day crew’s “talents”. Oh well, I guess that’s part of the deal when you spit in ESPN’s eye.

OK. Who watched the Idaho game? Well, me for one. And then over 86,000 other people came to Kyle Field to see that game as well. The defense allowed fewer than 100 yards and didn’t let the Vandals cross the 50 through three quarters. We did give up some trash yards on their final possession. Meh. Our offense methodically put up 37 points, mostly through the air, and Cyrus Gray got his 9^th consecutive 100+ yard game. Jeff Fuller and Ryan Swope had some great catches and Tanny went another game without being sacked. Another ho hum butt-kicking. Idaho wasn’t a bad team, they were just over-matched. We played the way you want to play a game like that. Solid, simple, relatively mistake-free football.

It’s time to unleash the hounds, or Collies as the case may be. I can’t wait to see this match-up. Since I bombed with the mic in my hands at the tailgate on Saturday I decided to bring back a favorite from emails past to make up for it.

Here it is folks. The joke.

So, Ol’ Rock is down in Mexico, exploring the local culture, tequila and food. He stops into a little cantina, sits down and orders a drink. Across the way he sees Pistol Pete dressed up like a bull fighter. He looks over the menu notices the waiter bring a plate of something to Pete and boy does it smell good. So Rock asks the waiter what Pete’s having. The waiter replies “Ah, senor, that is a wonderful delicacy. It is bull testicles from the bull fight this morning. A beautiful tradition and wonderful way to experience the local culture. In fact, Senor Pete has even decided to be the matador manana.”

Rock thinks, what the hell? Why not? “Can you go ahead and bring me a plate of those too? It sure looks good.”

The waiter says, “I’m so sorry senor, but we’re out. There’s only one bull fight each day, but if you come by in the morning and place your order we’ll be happy to prepare it for you.”

So in the morning Rock comes in and places his order and prepares to come back that evening. That night when he arrives at the restaurant he doesn’t see Pete, but the waiter has been expecting Rock and welcomes him. When he brings out the dinner it looks different to Rock. The chunks on the plate are small and it smells a little off. Rock waves the waiter over. "Say, this doesn't look very good tonight. I think I'll have something else if that's alright with you. May ask, by the way, why is it so different from last night?"

The waiter looks at Rock and says, "Well, senor, sometimes the bull wins."

And that's exactly what we're going to do to 'em Ags!

This is really going to be a great football game. 2:30 PM on ABC. Two top-ten teams. Explosive offenses. The weather is going to be warm and sunny. The tailgate is going to be awesome. We have a band coming, the ever-popular Jeannie (the bartender), lots of food and beer. Family fun for everyone. More fun for a few of us. Please come on out and have a good time at the tailgate. Tickets or not. We'll be serving food at around 11:30 AM and again after the game.

You know where we are. Just go out the East entrance to Reed Arena. Look for the Army truck, the Fire Truck and all those people in maroon.

Gig 'em and Beat the Hell Outta OSU!

Chuck '96

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